Sunday, July 3, 2011

Dealing with clutter that's not only yours, or, Death and Clutter

Friends know that I have been on a journey to declutter my home, not only from my clutter but from the clutter left by my pack-rat deceased relatives. They were witty and intelligent, but they did not subscribe to feng-shui or "live simply" philosophies. My grandparents were teens during the Great Depression and never quite learned to let go of stuff. They learned to ACQUIRE and SAVE. Unfortunately my father didn't live many years beyond them, and while he made huge efforts to pare down their belongings, his own health condition stopped him from eliminating the avalanche of antiques, fishing tackle boxes, 50-year old bills, rubber bands--you name it--that they had left behind. So that left me, a thirty-something, to sort through two generations' worth of belongings and then face my own clutter tendencies that have probably been learned as a result of being in this family.


Dealing with estate clutter is different than only going through your own stuff--especially if your relatives weren't highly organized. While my relatives did do some filing and labeling, working through layers of stuff has been like an archaeological dig at times. You do need to go through things and make sure you aren't throwing out a birth certificate, your vaccination records, or some other such document. But what do you DO with all this other stuff?


If you have a sense of what you want to part with, disposing of a bunch of stuff can still be daunting. Being a thirty-something, I didn't know all my options. If you have a house full of furniture and you are going to part with much of it, first consider having an estate sale or auction. You can do this yourself or call an auction company. They will itemize your belongings and give you a sense of what things could fetch. For instance, I don't ride horses, so it made sense to auction off a saddle. An auction gets rid of things you don't want in one fell swoop and generates some money.


If you don't go the auction route, or if you still have stuff to sell, eBay can be good for high-value items when you want a national audience. However, as an eBay novice, I didn't realize that I would have to calculate shipping and packing into the price. Sometimes it's not worth the time and hassle to pack and ship items. I sold some antique glassware and a quilt, but I hated calculating packing costs. That's when I learned to go local with...


Craigslist. If you have stuff to sell and want to deal with locals, craigslist is a sure way to sell your stuff when you price it right. You won't have the benefit of competing bids, but it's a nice way to part with items on your own timeline and set your price, without hassling with the post office. You need to take photos and deal with emails, but it's usually a fast way to get your stuff out there--and it's free to list.


Consignment shops are an option, but some don't offer pick up, or if they do, they charge a fee. Make sure the fee won't negate your profits. My favorite Austin consignment shop is Next to New on Burnet Road. They use their profits for charity, and it's a very well-organized store. You can part with large furniture and all types of things, but you can't control how much money you will actually make in the end.


Why did I not bother with a garage sale? If you're Type A and good at that, go for it, but the thought of organizing and pricing a mountain of stuff was enough to send me running and screaming. You need serious skills and manpower for a sale that large. I was better off letting the experts and market price my stuff. Plus donating the rest to charity fit well with my ethics, so it all balanced out.


I've never used 1-800-GOT-JUNK, but they show up on TV, especially Hoarders. We once used an independent hauling service--I think they brought a 20-foot trailer--when we did a major sweep of the grandparents' garage. I copied the whole Keep, Sell, Donate method from Clean Sweep. It was a-ma-zing to see how much junk was packed away in a two-car garage, and so, so lovely to see the trailer drive off down the street. I tried to make sure anything not ready for the landfill was kept, sold, donated, or recycled. I cringe when I see TV show cleaners trash plastic or paper that could possibly be recycled.


If you have a large book collection, it's worth taking your stuff by a bookseller who knows his stuff. I learned that older books don't have high value unless they are in good condition. Some booksellers might take your older books if they think they can sell them, but a ratty book from 1915 is not a prized jewel. If someone thinks a book from 1915 is cool, great, but it won't be fetching a ton of money just because it's old. (Using eBay to check for value is also a great way to see what your item is worth in the marketplace. Once you've figured out which books are worth selling, you can look for places that accept book donations.) If you would like to trade old books for new titles, try the awesome paperbackswap.com and exchange your reads with folks all over the country. Note: this won't actually reduce clutter.


Donating
All of the above methods take some work on your part in order to get money. If you're ready to part with stuff without paying the price of time, posting, etc. then charitable donations are the way to go. In Austin we have numerous non-profits that will drive up to your house and take your stuff away for you. It's easy to bless others with your stuff because let's face it, you don't need a bacon press with a pig on it!


I've donated stuff to these charities, among others:
The Salvation Army (they run a rehab as well as a shelter)
LinkTexas Paralyzed Veterans
The ARC of Texas
Goodwill (don't pick up as far as I know)


Book donations--most thrift stores/charities take them, but a great choice is your local library. Books either go into the collection or can be sold to raise money. If not, then they tend to have book recycling available. We also have a local charity, Inside Books, that sends paperback books to prisoners.


My favorite donation was giving a rarely used wooden chessboard to my friend who owns a hostel in Colorado. She said it got tons of use right away! The idea of guests playing chess on it makes me happy. She also took some houseplants off my hands.


More Disposal Options
A paper option that I wish I had heard of sooner: paper shredding services! It took that same hostel-owner friend to tell me that I could get huge amounts of paper shredded for a $40-$50 minimum. After a big sort for important documents, I absolutely needed this service. My relatives never used such services, explaining why they stored life insurance statements from the 1950s. Unless you plan a huge, safe, and legal bonfire, shredding is essential.


As a last but tacky resort, you can always put stuff on the curb. (This depends on the vibe of your neighborhood.) Then you can have fun seeing how fast your stuff disappears. Thanks to my neighbor for the visual reminder today. A neighbor across the street has had most of his items disappear, but no one wants a box of random clothes. We've put out larger items like chairs--we later found out our friend down the street grabbed one. Once even a broken garden tiller got snapped up--the guy who grabbed it figured he could fix it. You never know with the curb game.


If you can't even get to the point of parting with stuff yet, or if it's just too overwhelming, here's a bit of advice for knowing what to keep and what to sell or donate:


It's okay to keep some sentimental items, especially if they remind you of a lost loved-one. But if you don't love an item or plan to use it, chances are the item is better off being used by someone else who's excited about it. As they say, go bless someone else with your stuff! I still have some of my dad's books, but I recently posted his copy of Kings of Texas on paperbackswap.com. I am convinced the new owner is much more interested in reading that book than I will ever be! If you are grieving, parting with a loved-one's belongings could be a long process. Over time, you might find you are more willing to part with items that were loved by the person but just aren't fitting into your life today.


If you're letting your relatives choose your furniture style or decor for you rather than moving forward with your own tastes, then you might get stuck thinking the sensible thing is to just use what you have. After all, that's thrifty! I have been pretty overwhelmed by the amount of furniture I was left, and yes, I have lived with it too long because it's easy and practical to leave it. As time goes on, I realize my style (Pottery Barn) isn't my family's style, and frankly, I know my dad would say that a woman gets the final say on what her home looks like. Over time I plan to replace most of the pieces I inherited--I think some of remaining pieces will do well at auction, a consignment store, or craigslist. And I have plenty of other items, photos, and memories of my family so that I can move forward without fearing I'm getting rid of too much when I clear things out.


I will say that I have learned a lot from organizational gurus like the Fly Lady, Peter Walsh, and Julie Morgenstern. And without watching Clean Sweep or Hoarders, I probably wouldn't have had any idea what to do first! (We didn't have unsanitary conditions, but we had some serious antique and book hoarding to deal with.) So many resources are out there--what I've shared is what I have learned, internalized, and experienced. I'm no feng-shui master and I have a long way to go, but I never learned this stuff growing up, so I'm in process.