The trend of trashing things vs. donating them

You might have noticed a spike in advice to trash usable things in good condition so people can feel less stressed in the now--they don't feel they have enough bandwidth to drop things off at the thrift store, so they trash the items and get the instant gratification of less stuff. Proponents say that self-care is more important in the moment. I can understand the desire to decrease stress and prioritize mental health. This trash-it philosophy is touted by author KC Davis, and her advice has been cited and picked up by declutter gurus I like (such as Dawn Madsen). I don't personally follow KC Davis, but her advice has sure had a ripple effect. 

I don't find this advice ethical due to the environmental impact and taking away from thrift stores. Yes, trashing things produces a very instant result by getting things out of the house. But if people go grocery shopping and get gas, go to various appointments, and run other errands, then they are pretty capable of donating items in most cities. It must be a mental block. If people struggle with procrastination and/or mental health, the environment should not be unnecessarily impacted in the name of self-care. Not donating also takes away from thrift stores, their workers, and their shoppers who want low-cost items. I know there are mental health professionals who would disagree on this topic as well. We can take good care of ourselves and also work on taking steps to get to thrift stores or arrange pickups. If you live in a city (like I do) where charities or thrift stores will pick up your items, take advantage of the free service. Pickups can be arranged online or by phone. 

Because I think not donating items in truly good condition is a type of task avoidance, here is a link to procrastination advice from Dr. Timothy Pychl, who specialized in procrastination research. He says procrastination is a way to manage feelings and cope, but of course it can cause problems. You can also find various podcast interviews with him online.

Timothy A Pychyl Ph.D. Timothy A. Pychyl, Ph.D., is an associate professor of psychology at Carleton University in Ottawa, Canada, where he specializes in the study of procrastination. www.psychologytoday.com

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As the Fly Lady says, you can bless others with your stuff. Best wishes with your decluttering! 

Some recommendations for your current decluttering...

 I haven't posted in ages--hello, pandemic!--but I definitely saw how when things got stressful, my clutter became all the more visible. I've found some positive and kind declutter experts to recommend if you're reading this. 

The asynchronous Take Your House Back Course gives you a year's access to three ladies' videos, and they know their stuff! I most relate to author Dana K. White who runs her own site, A Slob Comes Clean. They also do Facebook Live events if you want a sense of interaction or live events. I also found minimalism scary or judgement for years, but their resident minimalist Dawn Madsen makes it understandable and not scary. I'm not at that level of decluttering, but she definitely helped me get rid of a lot of random stuff in my kitchen--I had a pressure cooker I never fully used but inherited, along with a random silver tray that went with an already-departed bacon press (?!). 

I just started a good read on Kindle that deals with emotions and guilt--it's called 
Decluttering as Yourself: A Book for People Who Feel Guilty About Their Clutter (The Declutter Bits Series) by Wendy Wiseman. 

It has a bit of colorful language, but so far I really like how she addresses that being tidy does not make one morally superior, etc. (I've met a couple very judgmental tidy people and got why she addressed that.)

I hope you are healthy and well! 💜

Welcome to the Blog--Again!

If you're visiting this blog for the first time, welcome! Please check out the archives for what you might be looking for. I spent years decluttering all kinds of things from multiple late relatives, two who grew up during The Great Depression. Post topics range from green decluttering to forgiveness to grief to facing your own clutter. At one point, I hired a professional organizer to help with a garage full of my relatives' things plus some other rooms full of their boxes I inherited. (It was worth having help--her brain worked in a way mine just didn't.) I've tried a lot of things and hope you'll find something helpful here. Some people come here from the Children of Hoarders site, which looks like it has an amazing wealth of information.

These days, I am mostly in the mode of dealing with my own items and trying to find sustainable routines to keep my own things from becoming disorganized. I still have some weird items hanging around, waiting for me to deal with them, like an antique family farm scythe (pretty sure it's from a grandparent's childhood farm) that I guess can go to Goodwill if not to some happy recipient at a family reunion. I have a collectible Edgar Rice Burroughs book (SO not feminist) that I mean to sell for maybe $10, yet I keep putting it off. I will need to let Half Price Books give me a piddly bid and just be done with the task hanging over my head.

As far as resources, I've been enjoying some videos and podcasts by Dana K. White at A Slob Comes Clean. The way her mind works makes sense to me, and she shows cluttered areas that look familiar.

Last night I heard a great 2016 interview on the Psychology in Seattle podcast with an expert on hoarding, Dr. Jennifer Sampson. She had some great insights about why the hoarding TV show's processes usually don't work long term; she also provided a lot of information that I hadn't already heard, and she seemed to have a lot of compassion for those who suffer from this disorder. I loved her and host Dr. Kirk Honda talking about her wanting to hold on to good boxes and packaging--I get it!

Hearing her interview reminded me that I needed to put up a welcome post for anyone stopping by my blog for the first time. One of the most powerful things she said was that hoarding disorder is much like an addiction--people are in recovery long term. I hope you are finding lots of help and support if you are on the journey, whether you had/have relatives facing this disorder and/or struggle with it yourself. As Dr. Sampson pointed out, more people than we realize have too much stuff, and it affects our lives in ongoing and sometimes major ways.

Bag Troubles Where Plastic is Outlawed

I just searched for "hoarding shopping bags" and found a nice list from Martha Stewart's website. Of five things to stop hoarding, bags are #1 on the list.

"Unless you re-use them, eliminate that stash of once-used paper and plastic shopping bags. Paper ones can go right into a recycling bin, and plastic ones can be donated to farmers and flea markets (or even animal shelters) for re-use." And, I learned you can recycle plastic bags at many grocery stores in a box outside the front. Keep your eyes open for those.

Plastic bags are banned in my city, so I do keep the few I have and don't feel much guilt. But paper bags--I constantly forget to bring in my cloth bags, so I bring home quite a few brown paper bags. Then I feel some green guilt about "wasting" a bag and want to reuse them. I use them to hold my recycling, but other than that...I don't have much use and they just sit around and take up space.

In the end, if I remembered to bring in my own bags, I wouldn't take home so many. I also need to just recycle them quickly because they take up valuable kitchen space.

To add to this bag conundrum, reusable bags can get pretty germy. It's not sanitary to use unwashed bags repeatedly. Outlawing plastic bags was meant to be a green move, but there have been unforeseen consequences and a rise in bacteria spread via bags. (FYI: "The baby carrier portion of the grocery cart is the most contaminated public surface you ever come in contact with." Thanks, USA Today.)

Growing up, we seemed to have only a reasonable number of bags stored. Perhaps because plastic is smushed and stores more easily. At any rate, I need to work on:

1. Bringing in my own bags--cloth or past paper ones. (Paper might be more sanitary because it's disposable?) I wonder if I need a sticky note in my car to remind me?
2. Washing cloth ones occasionally.
3. Recycling about half of my current paper bags. I can't use them fast enough unless I come up with a clear system of leaving some in my trunk and using them for a while. 

It's the Time of the Season for...Relaxing?

(Sung to the tune of 1968's "Time of the Season" by The Zombies.)

Gentle reader, I've been behind on decluttering as well as blogging, but that's okay. I'm usually quite diligent about mentioning the next free shred day, but I didn't make it this year. Too busy! It makes sense that at some point, the mountain of stuff from deceased relatives reaches a tolerable level and life focus shifts for longer stretches. Enough has been chipped away, and now the stuff left is mine or things I've inherited and could conceivably keep. I still need pare down, though. I have a guest room that could ideally be usable, and right now it's too crowded with a hodpodge of grandparents' keepsakes, my dad's photos, and my own stuff.


I had a very busy spring workwise, so this summer, I decided to just veg for the first part of the break. As in watching bad movies on cable because I can. Gone in Sixty Seconds is not a total waste of time. I admired the cars and some of the humorous dialogue. Is Angelina Jolie's character realistic? No. But I was still glad I watched it. (I also tend to rewatch Harry Potter movies in the summer, but that's higher quality.)


Sometimes it's the season for relaxation. For multiple summers, I'd go on a major decluttering spree giving away things like an old hatchet, vintage cleaver, fishing poles, and whatever weird but cool things I could find in my grandparents' old house. Friends were often amused and excited to see the current list of odd items leaving my home. I got a lot done, but it wore me out some. I'm not particularly left-brained, so it usually took a lot of mental and emotional energy to dig into that stuff.


This summer I decided to relax, so I'm having a cleaning service come by twice a month. They don't declutter so much as do the basics of housecleaning. Two very nice young ladies work for less than two hours. I've noticed I end up cleaning for the cleaning ladies before they come over—you don't want to get embarrassed by the kitchen, right? So their coming keeps me on my toes some. I doubt I'll keep the service past the summer, but there is something lightening and relaxing about having the basics done in such a short period of time. Knowing it'll be taken care of has freed me up to do more nitpicky things, like find my old pairs glasses from high school and my 20s and finally donate them. Fun declutter fact: Take old eyeglasses to Walmart optometry to donate old frames to the Lions Club charity.


I suppose there could be some judgement in hiring a cleaning service. In theory it's better (and frugal) to get good at cleaning my home quickly and regularly, and I have tried the Fly Lady system for “side-tracked home executives” at various times. I think cleaning one's own home is a necessity for most people, but I've also heard that if you aren't talented at something and can afford to hire someone else, there's nothing wrong in having someone else do it. I recently heard blogger and internet guru Michael Hyatt talk in podcast about his wife reaching that same conclusion about housekeeping. You also provide someone else a job. I have mixed feelings about admitting someone else can do it faster and easier, but my hope is that by having the basics done this summer, I can keep channeling energy into other things, including relaxing.


One weird chore on my list, though, is finally selling a couple of slide rules on eBay. A while back they were worth selling, so I'm hoping the market is still strong. I first saw a slide rule in a museum back when I was in elementary school—for the younger folks, they were the predecessors to the calculator. So yes, I have found two in my house, from the 40s or 50s, and yes, it's worth taking the time to list them, package them, and mail them out. I have to make enough of a profit to make the effort, but sometimes eBay is worth it. It would also help fund my summer cleaning service, so while things might cancel out some, I end up feeling like I'm getting a luxurious treat. This summer, it's worth it.